These words are overused...

...but New York, I love you.

9 months.

That's how much time passed before I finally made it back to my favorite city in the world (that I've visited, at least).

It seems completely absurd to me that it took me an entire 9 months before I couldn't stand it any longer. I thought for sure I would have made the trip loooong before I did. But, you know, stuff happens. And things that were once so much a part of your life suddenly seem like lightyears away and completely out of reach.

About two months ago, that's how I started to feel about the semester I spent in New York City. I mean, I know that I lived there for four months. The bulk of the entries in this very blog are proof. But all of those adventures... all of my time spent in that glorious city... just seemed like a complete dream.

So, sometime in late August, I started to work on a Kickstarter song for my aunt, Paula. She requested that I write about my adventures in New York City. This was a song that I had intended to write immediately upon returning to my "normal life" in Nashville... that way, all of my time spent there would be fresh on my mind.

But I didn't. Instead, I worked on other ideas. I pushed the "New York song" to the side. I think that deep down, I was afraid that finishing the song would completely end my relationship with New York City. That if I put my love in this form, it would forever cut our ties.

But when I started to realize that my memories of my time spent there were slowly slipping away, I knew that I had to write the song once and for all. And to my surprise, although 8 months had passed since I'd set foot in the city, the words just started flowing out like water from a dam. Thirty minutes in, and I realized that the song was pretty much finished in its entirety. And I am so incredibly proud of every single lyric. I know I've said this before, but I feel as if New York City is a friend of mine. A really good one. And I love her. And that may be weird, but I don't care.

Saw you first on the silver screen
The way you shined
I almost forgot how to breathe
Fought real hard for a chance to meet
You were perfect
And I was nervous in the best way

I was warned you had a dangerous streak
But you're misunderstood
You've been nothing but good to me
And I love how you never sleep
I'm always running
to keep from falling behind your pace

Don't you see what you do?
I am one in a million just chasing after you
And I know these words are overused
But New York, I love you

I'd get lost for an hour or two
Just to discover more pieces of you
And I feel safe acting like a fool
Cause there is nothing
No, nothing you haven't seen

I must admit
I'm the jealous type
When others visit you, all our memories flash through my mind
But that's why you're such a special kind
You're a melting pot of dreamers just like me

Don't you see what you do?
I am one in a million just chasing after you
And I know these words are overused
But New York, I love you

This is not the first song written for you
But it's all that I can give for now
And every line is true

Don't you see what you do?
I am one in a million just chasing after you
And I know these words are overused
But New York
New York, I love you

To get a FREE download of my song about the wonderful city, click here: New York, I Love You.

And there's a little YouTube vid of me playing it in my little Nashville room: 

 

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But this post isn't over yet! That was just a little amuse-bouche.

Upon finishing this song, my feelings for New York City were so out of control, I impulsively bought a plane ticket for myself and Bobby to go for a little visit. This isn't like me. I normally like to have things planned out long in advance. But nope. Just bought the tickets. Didn't even really think about where we were gonna stay or any of that.

And last week, Bobby and I had a magnificent adventure in New York City. I'll try to spare you the details in writing and instead, include an abundance of photos. Here goes!

We arrived at the Nashville airport at some ungodly hour on Monday, hopped on a couple of planes, and then pretty much immediately ended up at one of my favorite spots in the city:

Home sweet home :).

And we ate these falafel sandwiches that were literally the exact same size as my head.

And then I forced Bobby to walk about 11 miles throughout Central Park with me.

We discovered so many things I'd never seen before!

And did you know that there are waterfalls in Central Park? Ya. There are.

 And then our legs pretty much snapped clean off our bodies.

And we took the train over to Bushwick to meet up with my good ol' pal, Mackenzie. (aka: TORRES).

And we all went to get some dinner somewhere and then ended up at this awesome whiskey bar that just so happens to also make a mean grilled cheese sandwich. Noormans Kil. (My friend, Nick, bartends there, so we decided to stop on by!)

Then, Bobby, Mackenzie, and I trekked back to her apartment and passed out. SO tired.

Tuesday morning was yet another early morning for us! Bobby and I took the Megabus (same one I took last year!) to visit my grandparents in upstate New York (Lake George area).

And we chitchatted with both of them.

And we gazed out onto the beauty that is Lake George.

 And we both needed a picture with Grandpappy.

And I made Bobby walk even more.

And somehow, we were able to get ice cream TWICE in a span of less than 48 hours.

 And then as quickly as we came, we were gone. But it was oh, so wonderful to see my lovely grandparents and to catch up on life and to hug and squeeze them both.

Ps-- found this on Grammy's bedroom door before leaving. She's the best.

We got back to the city super late, so we immediately went to bed.

The next morning, we ventured out and found this little French-inspired cafe that had THE most delicious croissants I've ever had in my life.

(Bobby lookin' way too cool).

The rest of the day was spent wandering around the city... to Grand Central Station, to Chinatown for bubble tea, etc.

I may or may not have lost my wallet in there at some point... (I don't even want to get into it. But just imagine the most panicked expression someone can possibly have on their face, and that was mine for a good, solid ten blocks back to the restaurant where we ate lunch. Lo and behold, my wallet was just laying on the floor! No one had touched it. It was the most horrifying five minutes.)

And then Bobby and I got all gussied up to go out on a nice dinner date in the East Village.

But of course, it was hotter than Hades down in the subway.

And then, it started raining so hard, the water literally came through the ceiling onto the cars below.

I don't know if you can see it... but to the right of that man is a very intense downpour.

After running umbrella-less through the rain, we made it to our delicious destination.

Seriously. Just look at that.

Friday morning, we woke up and went for a run across the Brooklyn Bridge... well, to the "quarter way point".

We ate breakfast across the bridge in Manhattan at this cute, little place that I can't remember the name of now. AH. I should have remembered.

The rest of the day was spent exploring the shops in Williamsburg. And for the first time all trip, we had BEAUTIFUL weather. It wasn't hot. It wasn't humid. It wasn't raining. It was perfect.

So we chose to eat our dinner outside.

That's us winin' and dinin' at The Meatball Shop in Williamsburg. So. Good. I ordered some homemade chicken meatballs with a pesto sauce over a delicious selection of fresh veggies. YUMMO.

Later in the evening, we took a walk down to the water and came upon this glorious sight.

 Simply wonderful.

Then, we sauntered on over to the Brooklyn Bowl (music venue/bar/club/bowling alley... best combo ever) to see Mackenzie (TORRES) open up for Deer Tick.

She killed it. Per usual.

And there were so many people there... including several friends of mine that I haven't seen in a long time!

And then Deer Tick performed. Little did I know, my ears were in for a real treat. Every few years or so, Deer Tick does a tribute to Nirvana by performing the "In Utero" album in its entirety. For this brief performance, they're known as Deervana.

That's what I experienced last Friday night. And it was amazing. So so amazing. It was fun, they sounded great, people were dancing and screaming and jumping and throwing themselves all over the place. And let's just say, the night ended with the largest on-stage pillow fight I believe I will ever be witness to.

There were so many feathers, it made it extremely difficult to breathe. But who cares? YOLO. Right?

And sadly, Saturday was our day of departure.

Bobby and I devoured some avocado toast and coffee down by the water.

We packed up our things, and we had every intention of going to Siggy's Good Food (my old stomping ground) for lunch. One of the only things I wanted the entire time we were in NYC was their amazing salmon burger... And I waited until the last day to truly savor it.... And Siggy's was closed.

I was devastated for a good five minutes, and then I realized that it was just another reason to come back!

Instead, we ate some good old New York pizza for lunch, and we said our "farewells" to the city.

Gahhh.

What. a. trip.

I love it here in Nashville, but it was so wonderful to get a little taste of that city once again. It's good for my soul.

If you (whoever you are) have made it to this point, congratulations. I believe this is my longest post yet. You are a true gem.

Until next time!

<3

Nat

Thoughts and Hopes for 2013

I know I'm a little late in the game as far as a blog about the new year goes, but it is somehow fitting that I am just now sitting down to write this... I'm also not very vocal about this most of the time, but for some reason, I just felt the need to write it all out. Here goes.

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January 4th. We meet again. And as much as I kind of secretly wish you would just avoid my life altogether, I guess I'm going to have to face the fact that you will be around for every single calendar year from here on out. (That is, unless something crazy happens, and someone along the line decides to revamp the system).

You see, for most people, January 4th is just another ordinary day in the life. Or, for some, it may be a birthday. Or it may mark an anniversary. Or be the date in which someone started their first real job.

For me, however, it is an annual reminder of the "worst day" (Jonathan Safran Foer reference, anyone?) . Oh, the worst day. Isn't life interesting? Isn't it so fascinating that one, single date of the year can take on so many different associations for so many different people?

For those of you who don't know, on January 4th of 2011, my father passed away suddenly in his sleep. It came out of nowhere. And it flipped everything I've ever known and understood and believed in right on its head.

Since then, my soul has been ripped to shreds, has been slowly (and semi-haphazardly) pieced back together, and with a whole lotta time and a whole lotta love, has somehow come out on the other side even stronger than ever.

I know it sounds absolutely insane, but I feel like the luckiest girl alive. Truly.

It could be because I have an amazing family. And wonderful friends. And music. And a roof over my head. And food in my belly anytime I need it. And all of the other things that so many don't have.

I don't have my dad... and I would give anything to have him back again. But I still feel blessed.

My father was one of the happiest people I have ever encountered in my 22 years of life. It was very rare for me to ever see him without a smile on his face. Really. I know for a fact that at least one woman showed up to his funeral purely because she recognized his face in the newspaper and knew him as the "man who was always smiling" when he walked into the gym.

I can't tell you how proud that makes me to be his daughter. I would love nothing more than to be remembered in the same way.

So. Here we are. January 4th. 

But this isn't January 4th, 2011.
2011 is what I have chosen to call the "lost year". I don't really remember much of anything that happened throughout those 12 months. I believe Emily Dickinson says it best when she writes:

"After great pain, a formal feeling comes –

The Nerves sit ceremonious, like Tombs –

The Feet, mechanical, go round –

A Wooden way

Of Ground, or Air, or Ought –

Regardless grown,

A Quartz contentment, like a stone"

That really is the best description. I felt like a giant slab of stone. And thanks to the love and support from so many wonderful people around me, I was at least pushed (or, I guess, "rolled") through the year fairly unscathed.

Then, 2012 came along. 2012 was my year of "thawing". I slowly began to shed my rock-like layers and return to what my mother likes to call the "new normal". Because nothing is ever going to be the "old normal" ever again.

In 2012, I received an unbelievable amount of support via my Kickstarter from so many lovely family and friends (some old and some new). Because of this support, I was finally able to release my first full-length album, Savor.

 Also in 2012, I was lucky enough to be chosen to spend an entire semester in the always-amazing, New York City.

    Lots of wonderful things happened in between as well. I was able to go on a cruise to Mexico, my album was featured in the "New and Noteworthy" section of iTunes, I was able to spend a lot of time with my grandparents, I played so many shows I didn't know what to do with myself, and most importantly, I slowly began to establish a semi-permanent understanding of what this "new normal" would be. 

And now on to 2013. 

I have no idea what this next year will hold. Through the whole experience of losing my father, I know that life can change on a dime. As much as you think you have it all planned out, you really don't. And, for someone like me (who is somewhat of a control freak), this idea used to terrify me.

But it doesn't scare me anymore. Think of how difficult and exhausting it would be if you could actually control every single aspect of your life. I'll admit... there are some things in life that you can definitely control. Life itself is not one of them. And I'm okay with that.

In 2013, there are things that I plan to accomplish. Things that I would love to do, see, experience, explore, remember, and live. 

Most people call these "New Years Resolutions". I call them my "Hopes".

They are bound to morph over time, but for now, my "Hopes" for 2013 are as follows:

1. Finish all of my Kickstarter rewards for my fabulous Kickstarter backers.

2. Floss more. 

3. Remember to smile even if it is the worst day ever.

4. Read more books.

5. Write at least one song a week (even if it is so bad I never want to play it for anyone ever).

6. Keep in touch with old friends.

7. Make new friends.

8. Make it back to New York City at least once (even for just a short visit!)

9. Continue eating healthily and working out.

10. Take time to relax every once in awhile. It's okay to watch mindless television. In moderation.

11. Graduate from college.

12. Go on some sort of mini music tour.

13. Remember that it's okay to cry sometimes.

14. Continuously remind myself that I can be successful with my music. I can do it.
Someone has to have the job as a songwriter/musician. Why can't it be me?

15. Live it up.

I have no idea if any of this will happen, but I'm just excited to take on another year.

2013, show me what you got. 

Ps-- Just a sidenote: Aren't my parents the loveliest?

<3
Nat

Lake George escape and a new Kickstarter song!

Sooooo remember last blog post, when I was freaking out about the fact that it was "snaining" (snow/raining) outside?

Welp. Looks like there should have been an emphasis put on the "snow" part of that. 

That photo right there is the view that I had last Thursday morning at the nice and early time of 8:00a.m... I woke up at 6:00 in the morning, walked about 6 blocks with a rolling suitcase through the snow, and then stood for about 45 minutes right in that very spot, waiting for my very first Megabus experience to begin. 

But it was SO wonderful! I don't know what it was (maybe the sudden downpour of snow the night before), but I met so many lovely, friendly people on the way to the Megabus stop. Everyone was all smiles, I had a cup of warm coffee, and I was about to get whisked away to my grandparents' house in beautiful upstate New York.

Sidenote: I realized later (after boarding the bus) that people may have only been smiling and so nice to me, because I was wearing my boots on the wrong feet.

They probably just thought I was insane.

Okay. Back to the Megabus! It was SO wonderful. Really. If you've ever been on the fence about taking a trip using the company, just go for it. It only cost me $16 round trip to travel 3 and half hours to the Glens Falls/Lake George area. Easiest thing I've ever done.

When I arrived at the bus stop, my grandparents had literally just pulled up. And off we went to Barnes and Noble to get lunch/catch up/look at books, of course.

After quite a long time, we made our way to their house, where we sat and talked some more. (I'm pretty sure I talked more in those two days of visiting my grandparents than I have in the last two months).

And I stumbled upon this little creation in the guest room...

This is what grandpa does in his free time. He claims, "it keeps him off of the streets".

For dinner, we had delicious (and ridiculously cheesy) pizza from Harvest House in Glens Falls!

After a long, eventful day (full of talking), my grandparents were pooped. They claimed that I had worn them out... but honestly, I think they wore me out even more. 

Before heading to bed, though, we all sat and watched my grandma's favorite show-- "Jeopardy". (They are both quite good at answering the questions. Alas, I am not. Sadly, I only knew one answer the whole show, and it had something to do with "Honey Boo Boo". I have no idea what this says about me).

Friday morning, we woke up, downed our multiple cups of Black Magic coffee...

...and grammy and I talked even more. Yes. More talking. :)

There she is mid-sentence. I had to catch her in action, in her natural habitat.

For breakfast, we had some good, old fashioned, diner food at Hometown Diner. 

That is an example of the SHORT stack of blueberry pancakes. I don't even want to know what the regular stack looks like. And check out that entire TUB of butter. Literally. It is a plastic tub filled with butter.

Don't worry, I didn't use all of it. But I did pretty much finish all of the pancakes. They were too good to leave on the plate. 

Afterward, we drove into Bolton Landing, and spent some time admiring the beautiful view of Lake George from the Sagamore.

I mean, just look at that.

LOOK AT IT.

Lake George is beautiful at all times of the year, but there is something entirely different about seeing it in the winter, when no one is on it.. so incredibly peaceful. We sat there for quite awhile, soaking up the beauty and the warmth from the sun. I'm pretty sure grammy would have stayed there all day if she could... grandpa and I practically had to drag her off of the porch.

Then, we walked around the gift shop a bit, grandma bought little things, and we decided to call it a day. We had leftovers for dinner, we sat around, chatted some more, and all went to bed. Such a perfectly peaceful day in one of my favorite places on earth with some of my favorite people on earth.

Saturday morning, we had our usual coffee, our usual morning chats, etc.

And we went to the cutest little restaurant (Celia's Table) in downtown Glens Falls for lunch.

That right there is a delicious salad with the most delicious bowl of chicken pot pie soup. It seriously doesn't get any better than that.

Later in the day, it was time for me to head to the Megabus stop to catch a bus back to the Big Apple. Although it was a short trip, I can't even begin to tell you how wonderful it was. Not only did I get to spend some time away from the city in a beautiful place, but I was able to spend some alone time with my wonderful grandparents (whom I love dearly).

And guess what?? Good news! I am actually going to see them again this week for Thanksgiving. 

Grammy and Grandpappy: I know you both read this blog, so I just want to personally thank you for such a perfect few days. I love you both.

Basically, the rest of the week has consisted of school, internship (the internet is still down, so I only really went in for one day), writing papers, an awesome musical walking tour of the East and West village for class, a Veterans day parade that I stumbled upon...

a trip to the Trader Joes...

Quite a few fruit and yogurt parfaits....

A really strong (and cheap!) margarita...

...and a NEW KICKSTARTER SONG!

Yes. You heard me. A new song for my Kickstarter campaign.

This one is for my wonderful Kickstarter backer, Elizabeth Jensen. She wanted a song, on the ukulele, for her NEW fiance, Kyle.

You can hear the story and watch me play it live (in my awesome NYC dorm room) here:

And you can download the song FOR FREE here: San Antonio Line.

I must be off! I have quite a lot to do in a few, short hours. Because guess what? BOBBY ARRIVES AT 3:00pm. 

:)

And it gets better: His family arrives in the city on Monday, my mom arrives on Wednesday, and my brother arrives (just in time for Thanksgiving) on Thursday.

All is well in the world.

I love you all and I hope you have a wonderful, wonderful Thanksgiving. Eat lots of food. Give lots of thanks.. because we have a lot to be thankful for.

<3 Nat